Craters, Natives, & Beer

I'm straight up exhausted! I don't want to see a shovel until that mother fucker is digging my grave. Which by the way, I've got my entire burial planned out. For the whole viewing stuff. I'll be facing face down in a box (casket) buck naked. Across my ass will be tatted, "kiss my ass good bye." Then I'll be cremated. Ashes spread over either farm land of South America or the Patagonia. During the ceremony there will more than enough cannabis and craftsman brew. I want a shindig on my death day. No fuckin tears, I'm just another ass hole to bit the dust. Have some fun and remember me for the ass hat I was.
So I dug a cater behind the house last night and today. It's a ton of work! Pick axe, spaded shovel, and a wheelbarrow were my best of friends. In unison we worked the top soil layers. Working our way into the clay, which became cumbersome. Thick, heavy, and resilient. Unwilling to move even. I called in the troops,  Lagunitas IPA. Together we bared through the horror of accomplishment. Then I found myself drunk and shy of $10.Without regret, I was content with my results. An even ground and deep enough into the earth for my footing for the beast. A 2,000 gallon rain tank. None of this could have been accomplished without Hans and plenty of Rastafaria. The likings of Soja, Mellow Mood, and RasSody (Youtube it!). Now to lay down the bender board and pea gravel for the foundation. It'll be officially official. I'm about as excited about this officialness as the liberals are about gun control. Fucking stoked!
The flower beds have been acquainted to their new placement. Cardboard has met its endeavor along side native tree mulch and Hans' piss. I can feel the micro organisms growing per millasecond. My testosteronial hard on for native plant life, has taken place faster than Lance Armstrong's admise of performance enhancing drugs. Beer bottles have been "recycled" for pennies on the dollar, but I'm reminded of intoxicated late nights with bitter coldness and hard labor of my pale skin. The lack of melanin does distinguish me from my neighborly counterparts. Needless to say, the cold bothers me none.
My mere excitement of not paying a utility bill thrusts me with excitement. Enough for me to tender a hand to my neighbor friend, to share the same experience. Why pay a local utility when one doesn't have to? You do however pay some up front costs. But after that, you say a big, "Fuck you bitch!" after that investment. Therefore I lend a hand in knowledge, materials, and resources. There are many incentives with doing such an action. You're less dependent on anyone, thing, or governs. You're in control of your freedoms and desires. Which mean no harm to fellow man or earth. It's security. Not to come across all, "Zombie Apocalypse" like. But we are after all responsible for our own well being.....right? At least I hope...... If you don't think the way I do. Well here is Al Gores way of thinking about it. You'll prevent global warming. If you're just as mindless as the rest of his Scientologist followers. This should strike a cord with you. Collect some fucking water already would ya?!? I do believe in a lesser/lower carbon foot print and impact on life in general. It doesn't take a political biasness. It's mindfulness. It's respect. It's what the natives respected prior to our current arrogance. In old fashion terms, it would be referred to as, chivalry. Google that fucking word you maniacal, gamer, myopic consumerist! Name calling aside because myopic is also a clinical word for near sidedness. Fixed focal length, Asian people know what I'm talkin about. Being all minus 8 diapters in sphere power.
I'm losing track here. In the mean time. Here are some photo's for you illiterate type who couldn't make a word of what typed. Mind you. You can be rich as fuck and implement these "idears" or be broke as I am and do the best with what resources and advantages you have going for ya.

I need coffee like a crack head needs its dope. We all have our preferences.

 Since I work during day light hours. I have to employ flood lights. They do however work rather well. So I'm not entirely complaining.

I used a pickaxe and spaded shovel to create the circumference I needed for the footing. It took me 6 hours to get it right. The tank has a diameter of 87" (inches). The footing is 94" (inches). 3.5" excessive on each side to distribute pounds of pressure and to prevent the least amount of erosion over the long haul. 

  What happens from here is filling that crater with pea gravel. Pea gravel wont puncture the rain barrel and it's a small crush. So it compacts rather tight, creating a nice footing for the barrel. I hate concrete like a bad cause of herpes. Yes, a concrete slab could be poured. I want nothing to do with concrete. A gallon of water weights 8.34lbs. Times that by 2,000 gallons. That's fuckin heavy yo! I spent about 6 hours getting this right. It was labor intensive no question. But it's done and I'm happy about that accomplishment. Thursday it will be full of pea gravel and the tank will be resting on top of it.

Native plants

Today was one of those days where I end up feeling completely accomplished with how much I got done. Don't mind that I did laundry, vacuumed, washed dishes (no dishwasher damnit!), paid bills, and cleaned 2 guns. Sorry if the thought of guns scares you. Actually.... no I'm not sorry. Fuck you! I'm one of the responsible ones. So kiss my ass.
But I got everything done on my, "To Do" list today. And that list was long. My favorite of all the chores was visiting Water Shed Nursery in Richmond. There's this guy who I just dig so much. I've met him twice, not including today. The first time was rather insignificant. The second time he must have been bored, not much going on, or in the mood to shower me with his knowledge. Regardless, I appreciated it so much. This guy has the paws of Babe Ruth. You know this fella has seen a few soil compounds and dug a many holes. The kinda fella you wouldn't mind sharing a few beers and stories with. I went in today to put a few touches on this rather small section of my front yard. Which I haven't shared "after" pictures of yet. Not sure why. Possibly because I don't have pictures of it after I tore out all the undocumented plant life. What can I say? I'm a rather shitty blogger. I can't spell for shit, my organizational skills for blogging are ill fit, and I'm rather busy.
I picked up a fern that is native to my area. It'll be a nice fit for the space it was in intended for. I'm a sucker for native sages. The same way I am for a lady with a nice toosh. Boy oh boy! I can't keep my eye off of it and can't wait to touch it. But with sages, I can't wait to put my face into it and smell it for the entire ride home. Now if I can only learn the verbage. The scientific names for these plants rattle my head so much! I can't freaking remember these names. I know there is a thing to it though. My lack of understanding makes me unable to explain how I know. One day though! I pulled out thing outa the ground and cloned another.
I threw a shit ton of poppy seeds out about a year ago. Not a damn one has come up. And it's been almost a year. While on a walk. I saw a youngster. Pulled it outa the ground and threw it in some soil. Tap root is wicked long! I'll plant it tomorrow. All you need is one of these poppy's and they'll take over the planet! Just went you thought Latino's populated like rapid fire? Poppy's have got em topped, no question. I got a few extra grasses too. Still trying to dial in this particular section and I think I'm going to include this scrub. Just gotta wait for it at the nursery or try and clone one.
Ever since meeting my friend Cris Cruz. I've gained this insane appreciation and interest for plants. They are quite amazing and should have the attention of many if not all of us.
I've got a ton cooking in the backyard as well. I've been coming in late every night for the past week getting work done. I'll follow this up with another post and some updates on the back fence and its trimmings. In the mean time, here are a few pictures.